


a solemn vow

by Thedoctorsblogger



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Emotional Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-06
Updated: 2019-08-06
Packaged: 2020-08-11 03:54:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20147200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thedoctorsblogger/pseuds/Thedoctorsblogger
Summary: Crowley is worried that Aziraphale isn't happy because they don't have kids





	a solemn vow

**Author's Note:**

> writers month 2019 prompt kids

Anyone on the outside of the relationship of Aziraphale and Crowley would say that their relationship was perfect. Hell, even a one and a half of the people in the relationship would say that their relationship was perfect. 

Crowley was the only person on the planet that would disagree that his relationship was perfect. It wasn't that he wasn't happy, not in a million years would he ever say or feel anything close to that. No, Crowley just knew that if things were to remain the same way that they were now and the way they had been for centuries, the angel would never truly be happy because there was something missing. 

Crowley could see it every time they passed a baby in a stroller in the park, or when they saw children playing. Crowley knew that Aziraphale wanted a kid. Multiple if Crowley had to guess. Crowley knew there was no way that he could give his angel a child of his own and that made him extremely sad, especially when he saw how the angel interacted with Adam. 

~~

The thing about Crowley was that he was a terrible liar and an even worse Actor. Aziraphale could tell whenever anything was wrong with the demon, and something was wrong. Aziraphale wasn’t quite sure how to go about asking Crowley what was bothering him. Aziraphale never was too great with confrontation. He decided to go the most direct route. 

“Crowley, you look like something is bothering you. What’s wrong?” Aziraphale's voice broke the comfortable silence that had fallen between them as they sat in St. James Park. 

Crowley looked surprised that Aziraphale had noticed and a bit guilty that he was about to lie. “Nothing is wrong Angel, I’m just wool-gathering.”

Aziraphale gave Crowley a look that told him in no uncertain terms that he didn't believe for a second that nothing was wrong. 

Crowley sighed. “You want kids, don’t you?” Crowley made it sound like a question rather than an accusation even though he already knew the answer. 

Aziraphale was taken aback. “So this is what is bothering you?” 

Crowley just nodded. 

“Right.” Aziraphale started. “Well, I suppose the answer to that question is rather complicated. What brought this on anyway.” 

Crowley hung his head as if he was ashamed or disappointed. “I see the way you interact with them, and the way you look at them. The kids I mean. I can tell you love all the kids you see. It’s like each and every one of them hangs the stars.”

Aziraphale nodded, pondering Crowley’s answer for a moment. “Right, well I suppose you are right about that, I do love children. I love each and every one of them with all of my heart, but I could never have one of my own.”

Crowley’s head snapped up to look the angel in the face. Crowley looked into the eyes of his lover and saw a sadness there that he didn’t quite understand. “What do you mean?”

“Crowley, look at the life we lead, It hardly lends itself to be a suitable environment to raise a child in, And Crowley, we’re immortal beings. If we were to raise a child, we would have eventually watch that child age and die, and then we’ll get to watch their children age and die, and it would happen over and over. I just couldn’t bear to watch that Crowley - not to my own flesh and blood.” It was Aziraphale’s turn to look down for a second and then back up into his lover's eyes. There were tears beginning to shine in the angel’s eyes. “To watch that happen to someone you love --- No parent is meant to bury their children, Crowley. I couldn’t bear it, I just couldn’t.”

Tears were falling in earnest now. Crowley pulled Aziraphale into a tight embrace, gently rubbing the angels back and feeling shuddering breaths go through his chest. “Hey... Angel... it’s ok… shhhhh... It’ll be okay… I’m sorry, my love, I’m sorry.” 

As Aziraphale’s breaths slowed, Crowley's embrace loosened to allow the Angel to pull away. His arm remained around Aziraphale’s shoulders, the angel choosing to tuck himself into his lover's side. 

Silence settled upon them. It was Crowley who finally broke it. “So I suppose that means you’ve thought about this before.” He felt rather than saw Aziraphale nod. Crowley pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “It’s alright angel, I promise I'll never do that to you, I’ll never leave.”

Crowley made a solemn vow that night, and for the first time, he fully intended to keep it. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! let me know what you think
> 
> thanks to the best Beta ever @tv-saved-the-teenage-girl for everything.


End file.
